You are freaking allowed.

For those of us in larger bodies, it can feel like we’re hemmed in all around with barriers and gates and forms to be submitted in triplicate just to live our lives. To live in bodies this scrutizined and regulated and constantly criticized is to feel that we need permission to eat, to breathe, to step outside our homes and do anything at all.

I want to tell you that (with full consideration to the circumstances and constraints of our day-to-day lives) you have permission to:

Eat if you are hungry
Rest if you are tired
Sleep if you are sleepy

Touch if you would like to touch and have permission
Refuse to be touched if you don’t feel like it

Stop if you’re overwhelmed
Show your emotions when you have them

Be enthusiastic about things you like
Have hobbies and interests that suit you

Sing out loud
Not sing out loud

Be good at things
Be bad at things

Eat foods you like with textures that please you

Use makeup as art or refuse to wear it at all

Wear a dress
Wear pants

Speak up
Rest your voice
Protect yourself

Live in a place that feels like home
Move to a place that feels like home

Love who you love

Cook yourself a “healthy” meal
Cook yourself an “unhealthy” meal
Order takeout

Eat the damn doughnut

Sit by yourself at a restaurant
Decline a group outing
Arrange a group outing

Decline to see family
Arrange to see family

Ask for what you need
Take what is good and leave the rest

Tell your family yes
Tell your family no

Ask for help
Decline help

Buy yourself a gift
Give a gift away
Appreciate the spirit in which it was given to you and let it move on

Admit to yourself that you don’t care
Admit to yourself that you care

Forgive yourself for dropping it
for breaking it
for losing it
for messing it up

for ending it
for not beginning it

for not asking
for asking too much

for being afraid
for being overconfident

for taking it with you
for leaving it behind

for not seeing the future
for being afraid of the future

for sitting down
for not standing up

for your weakness
for your strength

for your humanity.


Hi! I’m Lindley

I’m a professional photographer (she/her, pronounced LIN-lee) who celebrates the unique beauty of bodies that fall outside conventional “beauty” standards. I live outside Seattle, WA.
People come to me for:

  • Body-safe portrait, boudoir and small business photography sessions
  • Diverse stock photos
  • Fat fine art photographs
  • Health at Every Size (HAES)-aligned consulting, writing and editing
  • The Body Love Box, my monthly body-positive subscription box

I talk about and photograph fat folks because representation of large bodies in the world is vital to our body liberation. Join me for weekly thoughts on body acceptance plus quick and useful resources for your own journey.

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